The first step is to consider: Who is your sharing circle for? Can that demographic, on average, afford to pay a fee? Will the pricebe a barrier for them? Is it a genuine barrier? Or do they not understand the work that goes into running a listening circle?

The second step is to reflect on: What expenses will I need to cover? (E.g. venue, refreshments, travel costs, training, insurance, supervision.) To make this sustainable, do I need to earn something? How long is the session? Will I be able to afford to go to a talking circle myself from any proceeds?

My advice is to work backwards from what amount you need to make this a viable activity in the long term, rather than look at what other circle facilitators may or may not be charging in your area or further field. If there is a reluctance amongst your potential attendees to pay, then some gentle education around the work that goes into running a circle is needed. Otherwise, you could see whether they would put in the work for a truly collaborative circle or look for funding if there is financial hardship. Keep reading for information on each of these approachess.

In this article, I’ve used a number of different terms for a talking circle – sharing / listening / healing / conversation circles.  You don’t even have to use the term ‘circle’. Again, start with thinking about the demographic that the circle is for and reflect on what would be most appealing to them.

My journey with charging

Before I go into the different models, I’ll briefly share my own journey with charging for talking circles.  Back in 2014, I really wanted to attend a Red Tent.  There wasn’t one nearby, so having attended women’s circles as part of trainings and retreats, I decided to set up my own.  The Red Tent Directory stipulated that such gatherings should be free or by donation. I started in this way, but found that the donations were sometimes not enough to cover the venue costs, let alone my time.

I then began charging and found that there was no change in who came.  I offer concessions and sometimes there has been someone going through a rough patch financially and they’ve come for a few months without charge.  There is flexibility.  For myself, I felt much more valued in my role as facilitator because I knew that people were willing to cover the time I spend preparing.  In September 2023, my women’s circle turned 9 years old and I don’t think it would have lasted that long otherwise.

1. Fee-based talking circles: What should I charge?

First, let’s be clear that people have widely different ideas about money.  The psychology of money is a fascinating topic and when you are charging for something it’s good to be aware of this.  Something I noticed when I was asking for donations, and this is a generalisation, is that employed people would give much less than self-employed people.  I wonder whether this is because those who are self-employed know the hidden costs in running a business.

The bottom line is that if someone values something, most time they will find a way to pay for it.  And if they are willing to pay, they are also likely to turn up at the event whatever the weather and after a busy day.

In my area (I’m in Southern England), in person talking circles that charge range between £10 and £17. As I said above, try not to work out what to charge by comparison, but by starting from the value you are providing and what amount would make it possible for you to keep running it AND happy :)  Burnout is just as possible for circle facilitators as it is for corporate high fliers.

If you are running a talking circle for a pair of people, for example a mum and daughter or expectant parents, the cost can reflect this by being higher.  There are two people receiving the value!

Should I offer a free trial?

Personally, I don’t offer free trials.  If people really want to come, they will be happy to pay.  Instead, I recommend inviting potential attendees to have a 10-minute phone call with me so that they can ask questions, I can manage their expectations and explain what happens.  You both have a chance to get a sense of the other person and if they’re a good fit for the circle / as a facilitator.

Do people pay in advance or on the day?

Wherever possible, I advise you ask people to book in advance.  This might be necessary if you have limited space, but also supports people to commit. There’s nothing more dispiriting than spending time preparing and setting up only for it to pour with rain outside and so people decide not to go this time because they didn’t pre-book.

You can either ask people to do a bank transfer or if you run multiple events, it would be effective to use a booking platform. Many exist like TicketTailor, Eventbrite, Bookwhen (put links), but I recommend Reservie because the user support is brilliant (I don’t get a commission – just supporting another small business).

Have clear Terms and Conditions about what happens if someone can no longer attend.  Can they have a refund if they give you 48 hours’ notice? It’s not good business practice to carry over a session just because somebody couldn’t make it at the last minute, but obviously being empathetic for challenging situations is always appreciated. 

2. Being paid to facilitate a circle

If the demographic doesn’t have money to attend a talking circle or it would be a major barrier to trying something new, then finding the money from a different source is a good route to take.  As a facilitator, you still deserve to be paid for your time and expenses. And remember that it’s more likely that the sharing circle will continue.

There are two options: you apply for funding or you approach a charity or existing organisation that works with your demographic already.

Applying for funding

The community interest group Becoming Mums is a wonderful example of applying for grants. They have secured funding from the lottery, the council and other places in order to be able to offer circles that are free to access in deprived areas.  Obviously, there is work upfront in filling in forms.  There are usually free workshops on how to apply for funding from the relevant organisation –  e.g. Community Foundation Wales, National Lottery funding, and Reading council community grants to pick some at random.

One recent trainee on one of my Circle Facilitation courses obtained local community funding for the cost of her training.  It’s always worth asking around to see what might exist in your community.

Another place to find money to support community activities is through Corporate funding. Narrative4 is an organisation who does this very successfully to enable its work in schools.

Working through organisations and charities

The other route is to ask organisations and charities that work with your target demographic if they would like to trial a talking circle.  For example, those who work with carers, refugees and asylum seekers, young mums… there are so many people who can benefit from a place to share their experiences.  Obviously, you need to have some relevant experience here, whether it’s from your own personal experience of being part of the demographic or having worked with them previously.

In this case, it might be a good idea to offer facilitating the first one for free, but with the clear understanding that if they want to continue offering this service you would need to be paid for expenses at the very least.  When working out how much you should invoice for, go through the same process at the top of the article: how much would cover your travel, time preparing, training costs (even if they were in the past), insurance (see bottom of article).

3. A collaborative approach to circle facilitation

A completely different way of running a circle is a truly collaborative model where all the members take it in turn to host and facilitate the gathering.  This may mean it moves around a different home each time, that a different facilitator brings their skills and interests, and sharing the responsibility for refreshments.  This can be a wonderful way of creating community.  Initially, it’s likely that one person will need to take the initiative for setting up a WhatsApp group or similar to organise the first session.

The guidelines can also be created together with different people suggesting what is important to them in a circle.  This approach means that one person will not feel burdened by always organising everything.  It will be important to agree clear expectations about the sharing circle: Is there a start time by which time everyone should arrive? What if someone doesn’t feel confident enough to host? What if there isn’t enough room in someone’s home for everyone? What if someone keeps ducking out of hosting – can they keep on attending regardless?

Whether this type of circle continues longer term is completely down to the commitment and participation of the members.

4. Free / by donation talking circles

Of course, there is a place for these.  As a facilitator, you either take the route above to secure funding or have decided you have the resources (financially and energy-wise) to be able to offer this for free or an unknown amount.

There are organisations that run free circles very successfully like the international Gather the Women.

The wonderful Positive Birth Movement groups that ran for a few years were essentially talking circles around the topic of birth.  It was stipulated that they had to be free and it wasn’t meant to be a space where services were advertised.  After some time, the founder Milli Hill found that it wasn’t sustainable to administer this big network and all the great resources she sent out without a fee to the group leaders.  An annual fee was charged to facilitators to facilitate this work, but this wasn’t enough to keep the gatherings going. The groups are no longer running and I wonder whether this wouldn’t be the case if the facilitators had been allowed to ask for a small fee.  This feels like another case of women’s work not being valued.

I am currently running pregnancy and postnatal talking circles for a suggested fee of £3 per person. I’m doing this consciously because I’m researching the topics that are interesting to this group and helping the monthly event to gain momentum.  After the word has spread, the cost will increase because it currently covers expenses only and wouldn’t be sustainable for myself and the co-facilitator long term.

Those who have relevant services may use a free or by donation listening circle as a springboard to paying clients, but this should be transparent.  For example, perhaps someone runs a menopause talking circle to provide a space for people to talk about symptoms and they know that the facilitator is a homeopath, reflexologist, acupuncturist or something else relevant. The time and resources taken in running the gathering may feel totally justified across someone’s business as a whole, but it’s important to review regularly. If you would like an audit of your heart-led business to see whether it’s sustainable, I can support you through mentoring.

Other considerations on charging for a talking circle

If you are planning a regular sharing circle, you might want to consider attendees paying for a block of sessions.  This would help create continuity of people attending and deeper sharing as relationships are strengthened. You can have a closed circle for a certain number of gatherings and call it a course or journey to differentiate it from open, regular circle time.

If you are incorporating a talking circle into a workshop or retreat, do reflect on the value that the experience will bring. It’s not simply a nice chat – good facilitation takes skill and practice.  If you are invited to host a circle as part of someone’s event, cost it out as suggested above.  I always think a talking circle looks easy peasy when done well, but you realise how much skill is involved when it goes wrong!

There is no governing body for talking circles in the UK.  As such you don’t need to have insurance to run a circle.  If you already run other events like yoga classes or provide counselling, you may be able to extend your insurance for those activities to facilitation.  Balens is a flexible insurer that I use. Another one I see recommended is Wellbeing Insurance.

To sum up…

If you’ve been invested enough to read this far, thank you, and I’ll make a point that is important: if you are telling people that a circle has to be free, you are assuming that people have the resources to make that happen and are potentially stopping financially disadvantaged people from being able to offer a sharing circle to their demographic.  Circle holding in a capitalist society is a different thing than holding space in a culture that fully respects the essential function it has.  Charging is absolutely ok – the most important thing is that your circle happens.

If you would like to start your journey to facilitating circles or want to consolidate your skills and become a more confident circle holder, take a look at my courses: